I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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