i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
