I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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