hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina