Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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