I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
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