smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
