Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
