through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize