susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
