If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize