I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize