is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
