I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
