strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
