Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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