Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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