What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
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