He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
