umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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