I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
