Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize