he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
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