oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize