I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Randomize
