i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
