My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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