you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
