So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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