If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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