google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
