Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
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