I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I think i got beer on your cat.
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