guys are not supposed to queef...right?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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