Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
