I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I need a beard to bite.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
