he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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