I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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