Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
