I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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