Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
