You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
