Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
