he shaved USA in his pubs
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
