I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
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