This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Two words: blizzard sex
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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