No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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