i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
