Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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