There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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