pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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